Namaste

So lately, to cope with panic attacks, I've been trying different methods. While meds are great, I've been using a certain type of rock, Kernite. I have three sticks of it, it's a clear crystal, very light. I use one on the top of my head, usually worn under a headband, and the other two I set beside me while typing or carry them in my pockets, left and right for balance. Last night I used a Kernite along with a round chunk of black tourmaline and it helped calm my third eye. Put me right to sleep on the floor! I also used a large, round, green Marble (very dense) at my middle and a deep red Carnelian at my base. I'm talking chakras here. I believe all that in conjunction helped me to sleep. I had taken my medication but sometimes the panic comes through and that helped to calm it.

In other news, I am back on track with writing, which means when I feel the muse! It's such a lovely feeling, to feel good when I write. And now I can blog or write whenever I want to. Journaling is nice. I've found that is a good outlet for release. Sometimes I just don't want what I say to be online, so it's handy to have a physical notebook. Mine's light purple, and I write messy all over the pages. Sometimes I go back and look and wonder what I was thinking! A lot of thoughts. Some of them not mine? Well, maybe so, but they seem like someone else's. Which reminds me of my character June. Or is her name ... Kate? She's a little schizophrenic which goes with the theme of magic and identity and time that I write. I can't wait till it's done, although it is so much fun to write. My characters are me and not me. It's such a joy to create.

Well, it's raining outside, so I might just go be in the rain. Hash that, I'm going to sneak past the rain, get in the car and go work out, lift some weights. Get that killer body back from when I was eighteen!

~ Peace ~

Mavericks

Maybe there are lots of forces in the world today. Indiana Jones is one of my favorites. Han Solo (basically anyone Harrison Ford played!) Character heroes we look to ficticiouslyly save the world. Then writers who are larger than life. If we lament their characters are too good to be true, then the writers must be next in line. Ursula LeGuin's made Ged, for example. But the Wizard of Earthsea was never quite made into the type of blockbuster hit that Indiaina Jones or Star Wars was, so alas, I love Ged, but Ursula is my hero. She made Ged! So what if she's just a normal person who happens to be good at story crafting? Again, I ask, who do we turn to when things look bleak? Someone or something outside ourselves? A hero? There are so many hero stories out there. I love them all. Every day someone is saving the world in books, in movies, in real life scenarios. I want to talk about being your own hero. Like the gal from my book, June Day. A girl who's finding her way in life like any other. Finding who she is and why the world is the way it is. She's alone for the most part, no one understands her special skills. She's a hero of sorts, but undeveloped in part. She doesn't believe her skills quite yet. Thus she sees the world in black and white. Finding heroes in her friends, her counterparts, yet never quite turning inward to pull the strength out needed to overcome. Except for when she meets a special boy, a special woman, characters along the way who help shape her vision of herself into the strong character she is near the end of book 1. One who can bend situations in quite magical ways to her advantage. Instead of running away, being chased, she becomes someone more than she ever thought she could be. Okay, that I can get behind.

Mendicant

I'm feeling pretty crafty as I just figured out how to take an image of a yellow rose and turn it into a jpeg to use as my profile picture. Go me! I'm sitting here sipping my tea and taking these pills 'ahem natural supplements that smell like marshmallows straight out of the bag. You know that sweet white powder smell I'm talking about. Mm hm.

Well, today I got some work in and of course I don't want to do it. No, actually I'm savoring the time leading up until I do do it. I rearranged the room. Emptied it of tulips that were beginning to make me sneeze. Why is it that roses do not have the same effect? Especially yellow ones? I'm sure some botanist will tell me the answer, if anyone ever follows my blog. Well, there's a flamingo staring me in the face. Coyly. I don't think flamingo's really look you in the eye ever. They curl around and act all graceful when really they are awkward and shy. Who would want long backward-bendy legs like that or necks that fold into pretzels? Try doing that on a date. Maybe the guy would understand. Honey, you just need to relax a little. Uncoil. Seems like a plan except then what? Do they sit or stand? Fly? Maybe dig for some minnows? If I were a flamingo, I would probably want to float around like in a bath. But that's just me personally.

I was about the read the sentiment on my teabag when the cup's contents just about spilled on me. Something about the self being precious. Well, I've run out of things to write about and that usually means my time buying has come to an end. Right. Linda Goodman's Love Signs, an astrology book, sits just to my left by Mr. Mysterious Twisty Flamingo. I wonder when he'll show up? My lover. Sweep me off my feet and marry me.

Like Wine and Roses

This has been a fruitful day. First shopping, at Value Village I might add, lots of deals and fun. I found killer jeans, a cute rolling duffel, indigo pillow for my writing chair not to mention a cucumber flavored candle and three marble eggs to spare. Did I mention I saved 30% and oh yeah, a five dollar pink yoga mat and curling pins? The list goes on...

Now as I sit to journal I'm drinking some mint melange tea from Trader Joe's with just a hint of Silk almond milk, vanilla unsweetened of course. I've got all the tools to write and inspiration to spare. Wearing my favorite oatmeal sweater, just the right not-blah blend that flatters from the back and my feathered/gold necklace and killer rugged boots. Indiana Jones would be jealous, so there.

First I journaled. Like in a journal with pen and paper. There's something about that that's freeing. Feeling the paper, the pen, the brainwaves going from left to right, or is is right to left? I don't care. I don't need to when the feeling's write. Right?! Writers beware. I'm about to get eclectic. Word salad. A bit ambidextrous and bipolar and dare I say it, schizophrenic too. Can I even spell? Who knows. Who cares. I'm an adventurer. My name is Lady Rose and whatever she says, well, it goes. As Kath from the book would say, dear, you don't know how to mend what's broke until you try making something first. Find the original pieces and put them together. Figure out how stuff works. That's what the world's made of. Tinkerers. Players. Games. Undoing a game is easy. Making one up? Making it work? That's a whole different story.

Ain't that that truth?

Lady Rose

~~Peace~~